Conference

Just returned from a conference in Saskatoon.

A few of us from work left Moose Jaw early Sunday afternoon, arriving there around 5pm.  Our rooms at the hotel weren't ready for us, so we got a coupon to enjoy a drink in the lounge.  I ordered a glass of pinot grigio.

In the evening there was a reception in the dining hall, and I was a bit apprehensive at first about going to it, as I still don't feel "known" here, but I went anyways.  I'm glad I went, as I met a number of interesting people and had a number of thought-provoking conversations.  Ralph, from Melleville, and Francis, from Saskatoon, are gifts from God, in the way they encourage and build me up.

Monday was full of lectures, speakers, and meals - the stuff of conferences I guess...  Mostly they were good.  But I sense a massive rift with my boss.  If only I knew what exactly he's after...

Today was more of the same.  I gave a 5-minute presentation on life at our health care facility.  It was very well received.  I take myself too seriously though.  Lighten up Neudorf.

At the end of the conference I attended Mass at the downtown cathedral.  Beautiful.  Bishop Bolen is such a class-act.

A Pathway: My Next Painting

After a three-month break, I took up painting again today.  My next painting's going to be of a pathway in the woods.

Ever since I got into hiking and walked the Camino in Spain, I've become enamoured with pathways.  Reading Arthur Boers' book The Way is made by Walking last year augmented this appreciation by exploring the theme of walking and pilgrimage from biblical, historical, spiritual, and theological perspectives.  It's almost as though Boers elaborated in words on a theme that I'd grown to appreciate experientially - by walking! - over the past 10 years.  Not only that, Boers' exploration of the theme confirmed something that I'd known intuitively for years: something happens to us when we walk.  Something spiritual.  God speaks to us. 

I've experienced this Voice over and over again, first when I started living car-less in Vancouver, going to many places on foot, but more particularly this past year after moving to the prairies, walking to/from work almost everyday.  In the morning, I pray while walking through Crescent Park.  In admiring the beauty around me, my spirit is taken up as it were, to contemplate God's own beauty.  The colours.  The smells.  The sounds.

But walking is conducive not just to praise, thanksgiving, and adoration, but also to repentance, lamentation, and supplication.  The most common words coming out of my mouth while in the park are Lord, Jesus Christ, have mercy on me, a sinner!  I tell God all my troubles.  I repent of my sins.  I ask for mercy.

It makes perfect sense to me that Boers considers regular walks a spiritual discipline, along the same lines as fasting or prayer.  When we walk, as when we pray or fast, things important for our spiritual well-being mysteriously come to the fore.  And mysteriously, God meets us there, on the way.

Wakamow .. Again

After following my usual routine of going to the early church service, I met a group of hikers around 11am and went for a hike.  We retraced the steps I took a week ago on an exploration walk.

After the hike we went to the Rock Creek and enjoyed a good meal together.  I ordered the usual: grilled salmon with vegetables.  Most of us also ordered either a hot chocolate or tea to warm us up.  I ordered a B52 - after the meal.  For dessert I had their chocolate-covered brownie.  Heaven.

A perfect day.  Church, hiking with friends, and a good meal.

Now I need to switch my mindset back to work for tomorrow.  Not all is well there.  I feel under a tremendous amount of pressure.  Much more-so than when I first arrived....

Books, Chocolate And Coffee

I went to Regina this morning to have a maintenance check (and interior cleaning!) done on my car.  While the mechanics were busy working, the car dealer shuttle driver was kind enough to drop me off downtown, where I could walk around a little and discover some of this city on foot.  I accomplished the following:

I discovered a bookstore that focuses on theological and spiritual themes.  Nice!  Being inside the store reminded me of all the hours I spent at the Regent Bookstore on the west coast.  How much money I spent there!  I was quite tempted to open my wallet and let myself go here, but happily, I was able to control my consumerist desires and adhere to the vow I made at the beginning of this year: no books until 2014!  I did, however, buy some resources for work: a few books on prayer and some cds with good music.

Afterwards I went to a local chocolatier and bought some chocolate for Spiritual Care Week, an upcoming event at work that I plan to use to raise awareness of the work that we do as soul-care practitioners.

Then I went to my favourite coffee shop - a short 2 block walk away - for a cappuccino.  In the past I'd have used this opportunity to take out whatever book I'm reading and read for awhile, but these days I'm not reading much, and I was content to just sort of sit and sip.

Mid-afternoon I called the shuttle driver who came and picked me up and drove me back to the car shop.  $300+ later, my car is now "roadworthy" again.  And it's clean inside, too.

Temperature during the day is around 10C.  Winter's just around the corner.

Tomorrow I'm going hiking in Wakamaw again.  This time with other hikers.

Thanksgiving

Fruit of the harvest, displayed at church a few days ago on Sunday.

I'm beginning to understand now why in the history of the church, creation has been given the feminine gender.

Given the right mix of water, sun, and light, the earth is indeed rich and fruitful.

A Little Church

Yesterday I went hiking about nearby with my hiking friends, and on the way there I came across this small little chapel, St. Columba.  I stopped my car and took some pictures, and couldn't help but wonder what the context was at the time the chapel was built in, probably about 80 years ago or so.

It's literally out "in the middle of nowhere".  There are no houses around.  The closest farm house is surely no less than 1 km away.  And that's just one house.  My guess is that there are only about 5 other houses within a 10km radius.  There is no small town nearby either.

As the pictures show, the church is surrounded by a well-kept cemetery, with, oh I'd guess about 40 grave stones.  Some of the stones had new (artificial) flowers on them.

Why was the church built here?

Who were the congregants?

Why was it closed?

Who is buried here?

Buffalo Pound Hike

A gorgeous day to be out for a hike today.  Fall is beautiful.  Much to be thankful for.

Wakamow Valley Walk

I went to church this morning.  How disappointing to find out that there would be no Eucharist on Thanksgiving Sunday.  Eucharist means thanksgiving in Greek.  What an irony: no thanksgiving on Thanksgiving.  I've never noticed this liturgical detail before....

Afterwards I went to my usual coffee shop and parked myself there for 4 hours and read.  I finished reading a book by Henri Nouwen on aging.  Profound.  I looked back over the last 5 years or so and noticed that he's the author I've read most during this timespan.  Time well spent.

Around 2pm I escaped the coffee shop, went home to get changed, got into my car and drove to Wakamow Valley, where I parked and went for a hike.

I hiked 13k's in total.  Fall colours were on full display.  Below's proof.

Camino: Day 17 Revisited

Exactly a year ago I arrived in Santiago de Compostela.  Seventeen days of walking, covering 400 kms.  Upon arrival, here are the lines I wrote in my little blue notebook.

* woke up at 7:15am - I was just about the last one to get up; cafe con leche

* began walking at 8am: still dark - used frontales (head lights) for 1 hour

* stopped at 10am at Casa Porta de Santiago for biscocho and cola cao (hot cocoa)

* praise God!  arrived in Santiago at 1:30pm - did good time - praise

* 2:30pm - got my Compostela (certificate)

* 3pm - pictures

* 3:30 saw Leah and Cathy - more pictures

* 4:30 checked in at Badalada

* 5-7, cleaned up, shaved; Lord of the Rings was showing on tv!

* dinner at Rúa Bella

* very emotional approaching Santiago crosses on fence moved me; I was in tears on several occasoins; why?  Not sure...

Camino: Day 16 Revisited

Here's what I wrote a year ago after completing the 16th day of walking on the Camino de Santiago:

* woke up at 7:20am; left albergue at 8; breakfast at 8:30; began walking at 9

* cafeteria was packed with peregrinos!

* 9kms completed by 11:20

* bocadillo de ternera upon arrival in Salceda

* Camino Francés is like Grouse Grind: packed full of people!

* albergue in Pedrouzo

* beautiful church (even though very small), and it was open!  it had a shell-shaped back wall; beautifully lit!

* dinner at Che Cafe; spaghetti bolognese, albondigas con arroz, and caldo gallego; of course, café con leche afterwards - damn, coffee is good in Spain!

* somewht sad that it all ends tomorrow

Camino: Sobrado Revisited

After my 3rd and final day of rest in Sobrado last year on this day, this is how I felt:

* attended Laudes and Eucaristo; very lovely - there's something special about this monastery

* I'm still unsettled [after Jennifer's departure yesterday] - a tremendous feeling of desolation has come upon me; why do I feel so alone?

* monasteries always bring me face to face wtih my neediness and brokenness

* and yet, in the chapel, looking at the crucified One, I find peace; or, maybe Peace finds me...

* walked around town in the afternoon

* Visperas and Completas: "Salve Regina" - so beautiful!

* tomorrow the Camino continues: Lord have mercy!

* cleaned up room before going to sleep

Another First: Chocolate Zucchini Cake

I made my first chocolate zucchini cake today.  It turned out fabulous.  I used this recipe from the internet.

On a slightly downcast note: today was cleanup day at the community garden.  All my plants are now uprooted, gone.  Mind you, many of them had already withered, after working so hard to produce fruits.  It seems like they spent all their energy to produce, and afterwards, they are too weak to continue.

Gardening has been a thoroughly positive experience.  I've applied for a 10 x 20 for next summer.

Success stories: zucchini, potatoes, green beans, carrots, and corn

So-so: peas

No-gos: onions, watermelon

Next year: go with the things that worked, and try tomatoes and red peppers also; try onions again: it seems to have been an off year

A Drop Of Europe .. In Regina

I thought I I was in Europe.  But I was in Regina.

I went to my massage appointment early this morning, and since I don't start work until noon on Tuesdays, I decided to park myself in a coffee shop for breakfast after the appointment.  And since at the hike two weekends ago some of my fellow hikers mentioned that there are some nice coffee shops on 13th Ave, I went there to take a look for myself.  And they were right.

There were at least 2 or 3 places to choose from, but I chose the 13th Ave Coffee House, primarily because it looked more interesting than the others - as the name suggests, it's a house, not a "store" or "shop" - and also, it was right across from the big cathedral.  I took a picture of it below.  I like the sunlight peaking through from behind the left spire.

When I got out of my car, I looked to my left and my right, and for a second I felt like I was in Europe: urban, small shops and boutiques, anchored by a massive church.  The only thing missing were cobbled stones...

Once inside, I had a cappuccino and a breakfast bowl with all kinds of good stuff: strawberries, pecan, cinnamon, maple syrup, and cottage cheese.  Oh, and coconut shavings too.  Very good.

I didn't have enough time for reading, but next time I go I will make sure I leave enough time to bring a book along and have some quiet time. Speaking of which, my next appointment's on the 15th.  I know where I'm going for breakfast on that day...

Church Bells

As I write this - at 10:19am - the church bells are ringing in the distance.  I'm sitting inside a coffee shop, and the reason I can even hear the bells is because the doors of the place are open: the barristo burnt my breakfast panini.  The smell of burnt bread permeates the place.

The point of today's post is that one of the things I love about Moose Jaw is that while not being any more nor less religious than other Canadian cities, there seems to be a residual appreciation for tradition here.  One example of this is that older brick buildings from a bygone era are not only intact, but well taken care of, looking great.  None of this tearing them down stuff and building something "new and improved" that's so evident in Vancouver.

Another example is the ringing of church bells on Sunday mornings.  I noticed it first on Easter Sunday in April, when on the way to church I heard beautiful Easter music streaming from the tower of a large church nearby.  Five minutes and 5 blocks later, as I approached my church, the sound of the hymns faded in the distance, and the sound of church bells intensified.  At that time I thought "This is great!  Easter in Moose Jaw!"

But since then I've been pleasantly surprised by - and indeed, have become accustomed to - the ringing of church bells on a weekly basis by local churches.

The priest at my parish recently also began ringing the bells on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursday mornings and afternoons, to mark the beginning of Morning and Evening prayer.  He said to me that the purpose of ringing these bells is to "remind those who cannot attend the appointed prayer times at church that they can still pray in whatever context they find themselves in, in the quietness of their own hearts."  

How cool is that: the church bells remind us that whether we're working or grocery shopping, banking, sipping a coffee, or walking to/from work (that's usually the case with me, and the bells always remind me that I'm a bit late for work!), we can approach God in praise, thanksgiving, and supplication at any time.

I asked him if he ever gets phone calls to complain about the bell-ringing.  He responds "No, actually, I've had a few phone calls where people call and say that they appreciate the sound of the bells; and interestingly, some of the people that call are not even people of faith."

So, I'm not certain why traditions such as bell-ringing continue here, whereas in bigger cities they fall by the wayside, but whatever the case may be, I find it refreshing.  Ring on...

Hiking Moose Mountain

Today we drove 200+ kms southwest of Regina to Moose Mountain Provincial Park.  Gorgeous Fall colours were on display.

17km hike.

Sunny.

Chilly at first, warm throughout the day.

Good company.

Dinner at the pub afterwards.

Grocery shopping in Regina.

Back in Moose Jaw by 9pm.

Camino: Day 7 Revisited

This is what I had for breakfast a year ago.  Biscocho y cafe con leche.  Unbeatable, in my humble opinion.

I paid for the first biscocho.  Miguel gave me one "for the road".  I finished it well before the halfway mark.

Here's what I thought about a year ago during the walk.

In reflecting on my walk over the past few days, I'm coming to the conclusion that I have a deep discomfort, even dislike, with who I am.  In the eyes of the world I must be a nobody: no career, no family, no property, no car.  Nothing.  What do I have to show for my 42 years of living?  Seemingly nothing.

I know that God is not looking for any accomplishments.  In his eyes I'm a deeply valued person, created in his image, but I still feel massively disappointed with who I am.  I don't meet my own standards (nevermind the world's).  I feel like a failure quite often.

I guess this is what walking alone for long periods of time can do: it's like facing a mirror for a long time.  As you keep looking at it, you begin to see yourself without a mask on, as you really are.  You see the warts, the freckles, the imperfections, signs of age, etc...  I'm not as bad as I make it out to be here, but I'm certainly not as good and happy as I pretend to be.

I'm not sure if the way I feel about myself has changed significantly in the past year.  I keep thinking "if only this happened...." or "if only I could......" or "if only that issue was resolved..."

Maybe others are more satisfied with their lives than I am, but I doubt it.

I have a massive hunger to do another Camino.  But this time the purpose would be much less about discernment, and much more about the search for and enjoyment of community.

Camino: Day 6 Revisited

Here were my notes last year after the 20km journey from San Juan Villapañada - Salas.

* early start, again, around 8am

* breakfast in Cornellana (8km)

* Monasterio del Salvador a nice site for pics; in ruins

* feet are killing me; left foot especially, 3-4 blisteres; right foot ok, but developing blister on big toe

* 20kms [a day] ok, but still "too much"

* staying @ Miguel's Albergue La Campa; restaurant [attached to albergue] has fantastic food, home-made; biscocho was excellent

* best meal in Spain, so far

* lentejas soup

* cold, maybe 8C @ night; little heating

* Casa cultura: free internet

Cornellana:

Sigue la flecha (follow the arrow)

Albergue La Campa