Sunday, January 29, 2006

Qualicum Beach Report

This weekend I spent at Qualicum Beach, on Vancouver Island. I went there with our church Evening Service Committee. It was a short get-away, only 1.5 days, but even so it was good. Here are some pictures from the weekend:

Ferry ride:















Qualicum Beach:















Friendships:

Saturday, January 28, 2006

New Heaven, New Earth

Wait for the Lord, whose day is near.
Wait for the Lord: keep watch, take heart!

Friday, January 27, 2006

In Exile .. Again

My stomach is in knots. I’m often on the verge of tears. I can’t seem to get anything right with AEK.

Over the Christmas break we met twice, only for her to tell me that she does not want to spend time with me, whether it be one-on-one or in a group.

Since then we’ve had two conversations: one by phone, and one in person at school. Both were positive, in fact, very encouraging. At the end of our last talk early last week we discussed getting together this week.

Last weekend before going to Pender Harbour I emailed her and asked her if she wanted to get together for a coffee or dinner sometime this week. Upon my return, I was disappointed to read in her response that she was annoyed that I’d asked her out for dinner. She felt I’d disrespected her boundaries.

I emailed her back early this week, apologizing for being presumptuously hopeful based on our last few conversations. I also told her that going forward I’d no longer be the initiator in our friendship, because frankly, I’m weary of apologizing for reaching out to her.

Back into exile I go.

Maybe my friends are right in telling me I need to move on. One friend said “If God wants you to be together, he’ll orchestrate it. In the meantime, forget about her and move on.” I wonder about that. I admit I’m growing increasingly sceptical of God’s “active work” in our lives. I’m becoming a jaded cynic. Damn it, haven’t I learned enough lessons about love yet?

I miss her very much, especially her steadfastness, loyalty, faithfulness, and acceptance. I miss her friendship, her companionship, her presence. I continue to wonder whether I will ever meet someone else with whom I have so much in common. I still think that breaking up was the right thing to do at the time, but increasingly I feel that the final chapter of our story is yet to be written. I’m not sure what that means.

I feel like a complete, utter, useless failure.

Thursday, January 26, 2006

Happy 64th, Mom!

I'm very lucky to have a mother who cares deeply about her family. I'm so proud of her. She sees her role as a supporter, supporting husband, children, and grandchildren to a point that is simply admirable.

I'm humbled by her commitment. She gives of herself to others, even if it's at her own expense, to her own disadvantage.

May I never take for granted the privilege I have had, having been raised in a Christian family, by a godly mother.

Here's a picture of mom, taken late December 2004 (it's a typical 'mom' picture .. smiling, but with her hands full!!):

Heavenly Father, I thank you for giving me a loving and caring mother.

Grant her patience, energy, and strength in her tasks.

Bless her, through Jesus Christ our Lord, let it be so.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Tories In .. Liberals Out .. Finally!!!

For once, common sense prevailed (albeit just barely) in our national election. I couldn't bear another 4 years of Liberal rule.

Here's how it all turned out:

Conservatives: 124 seats
Liberals: 103 seats
Bloc Quebecois: 51 seats
National Democratic Party: 29 seats

Unfortunately, it's only a minority government. I wonder if we'll do this all over again in two-years-time.... In the meantime, hopefully some positive things can impact this nation for the better.

Lord, bless this nation.
May her leaders seek direction and guidance from you,
for you alone are the source of wisdom.

Rosewoods Report

Seven of us - MLe, MLo, JW, OYS, CM, RC, and I - met late afternoon on Friday, and embarked on a weekend get-away trip to Pender Harbour. We'd planned the weekend as a way of strengthening friendships and getting some good rest early in the semester, before the stress of papers, research, writing, and exams engulf us.

It was indeed a great time of community-building. Nothing brings people together more than "living under one roof."

Here are some highlights from our weekend:

* Food - CM did a phenomenal job with the food. We ate spaghetti, granola (MLo actually made it), Spanish tortillas, brownies, and plenty of fruits. MLo made amazing coffee too.
























* Worship - on Sunday morning we had a wonderful time of worship together. MLe lead the singing, MLo lead the sharing, and I lead prayers. I was amazed by the depth of commitment and faith in our group. What a blessing!











* Canoeing - A few of us went canoeing. I loved the physical exertion to my arms!!! I should take up canoeing.... Furthermore, the scenery was stunning. I found myself praising God as I was rowing through the calm waters of the inlet.





















* Games - We played a lot of games. My favourite was Rook. I've always enjoyed good card games.





















* Mate - JW should be a salesman for yerba mate. He brought his guampa and bombilla, and convinced everyone that drinking mate was not only a great drink, but a great way to build community. Well done JW!!! We'll make a Paraguayan out of you yet...!!!











* Photos - I took over 200 pictures. MLo is a great photographer, so I got many tips on how to take good pics from him. It helps that we live in paradise here, so it's not difficult to find good photo targets!































* Impromptu road-soccer - JW's van broke down on our way to a hike on Sunday, so while stuck waiting for help, we brought out the soccer ball and played in the middle of the road. Sweet!

There were also a few disappointments:

* Van problems - JW was kind enough to drive us up in his van, but unfortunately it broke down twice, and that ended up wasting valuable time. It delayed our arrival on Friday by 4 hours, and it prevented us from going hiking on Sunday.

* It was not a restful weekend. In light of car troubles it was hard to relax. Personalitites were tested, characters stretched.

* Study - I only got in about 30 minutes of reading.

Monday, January 23, 2006

Back From Rosewoods

I'm back from Rosewoods, on Pender Harbour. Had an amazing time of fellowship with friends. God is so good to us.
















Will say more tomorrow.

I'm tired. It's 10:34pm. Going to sleep.

Sunday, January 22, 2006

200

Today's my 200th post. It's been almost a year now since I started journaling.

Friday, January 20, 2006

Retreat-A-Mania

Each of the next 3 weekends I'm going on retreats.

This weekend, 1.20-22, I'm going up the Sunshine Coast to Pender Harbour with my Community Group.

Next weekend, 1.27-29, I'm going to Qualicum Beach with my church's Evening Service Committee.

Finally, the first weekend of February, 2.3-5, I'm heading up to Vernon with the a group of friends I affectionately call F1 Freaks, because of our obsession with Formula 1 motor racing.

Gonna take lots of pics to post here. :)

Thursday, January 19, 2006

God And Doughnuts In America

I read an article today called The Christian Paradox. How a Faithful Nation Gets Jesus Wrong. This article can be found here.


This article articulates in a relatively short format the nature of American Christianity today. I found it very interesting, as it verbalizes many of the sentiments I have towards (against?) the type of Christianity proclaimed by our southern neighbours.* While some of these sentiments are probably justified, I do acknowledge that some of them are sinful. I need to examine my soul, discern where the sin lies, repent, and accept God's refreshing grace.

Still, the article exposes what I believe to be some very serious problems that contemporary American Christianity poses to the church, and for that matter, the world. Here are some thought-provoking quotes from the article:

"Three quarters of Americans believe the Bible teaches that 'God helps those who help themselves.' That is, three out of four Americans believe that this ĂŒber-American idea, a notion at the core of our current infividualist politics and culture, which was in fact uttered by Ben Franklin, actually appears in Holy Scripture."

"America is simultaneously the most professedly Chrsitian of the developed nations and the least Christian in its behaviour."

"Despite the Sixth commandment, we are, of course, the most violent rich nation on earth, with a murder rate four or five times that of our European peers. We have prison populations greater by a factor of six or seven than other rich nations (which would give us plenty of opportunity for visiting the prisoners). Having been told to turn the other cheek, we're the only Western democracy left that executes its citizens, mostly in those states where Christianity is theoretically strongest. Despite Jesus' strong declarations against divorce, our marriages break up at a rate - just over half - that compares poorly with the European Union's average of about four in ten. . . Teenage pregnancy? We're at the top of the charts. Personal self-discipline - like, say, keeping your weight under control? Buying on credit? Running government deficits? Do you need to ask?"

In many American churches, ".. pastors focus relentlessly on you and your individual needs. Their goal is to service consumers - not communities but individuals . . . who aren't tightly bound to any particular denomination or school of thought. The result is often a kind of soft-focus, comfortable, suburban faith".

"A New York Times reporter visiting one booming megachurch outside Phoenix recently found the typical scene: a drive-through latte stand, Krispy Kreme doughnuts at every service, and sermons about 'how to discipline your children, how to reach your professoinal goals, how to invest your money, how to reduce your debt.' On Sundays children played with church-distributed Xboxes, and many congregants had signed up for a twice-weekly aerobics class called Firm Believers."

"Love your neighbour as yourself: although its rhetorical power has been dimmed by repetition, that is a radical notion, perhaps the most radical notion possible. Especially since Jesus, in all his teachings, made it very clear who the neighbour you were supposed to love was: the poor person, the sick person, the naked person, the hungry person. The last shall be made first; turn the other cheek; a rich person aiming for heaven is like a camel trying to walk through the eye of a needle. On and on and on - a call for nothing less than a radical, voluntary, and effective reordering of power relationships, based on the prinicple of love."

"A rich man came to Jesus one day and asked what he should do to get into heaven. Jesus did not say he should invest, spend, and let the benefits trickle down; he said sell what you have, give the money to the poor, and follow me. Few plainer words have been spoken. And yet, for some reason, the Christian Coalition of America - founded in 1989 in order to 'preserve, protect and defend the Judeo-Christian values that made this the greatest country in history' proclaimed last year that its top legislative priority would be 'making permanent President Bush's 2001 federal tax cuts.'

"It's hard to imagine a con much more audacious than making Christ the front man for a program of tax cuts for the rich or war in Iraq. If some modest part of the 85 percent of us who are Christians woke up to that fact, then the world might change.'

He concludes, "..money changers and power brokers will remain ascendant in our 'spiritual' life. Since the days of Constantine, emperors and rich men have sought to co-opt the teachings of Jesus. As in so many areas of our increasingly market-tested lives, the co-opters - the TV men, the politicians, the Christian 'interest groups' - have found a way to make each of us complicit in that travesty, too. They have invited us to subvert the church of Jesus even as we celebrate it. With their help we have made golden calves of oureslves - become a nation of terrified, self-obsessed idols. It works, and it may well keep working for a long time to come. When Americans hunger for selfless love and are fed only love of self, they will remain hungry, and too often hungry people just come back for more of the same."

That concludes my 'highly selective, completely biased', choice of quotations. I looked for some potential quotes that communicated a sense of hope on the author's part, but there just were none. Sorry.
***

* For the record, Canadian Christianity is (arguably) even worse off, but no one notices that because Canada is a small fish in the pond of Christianity. America, however, is a big fish, and big fish make big waves. In other words, the influence America has on the world's perception of Christianity is much much larger than the influence the great white north has.

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Winter Courses: 2006

Here are the courses I'm taking this semester:

1 - History of Christianity II (Tues, Thur 9:30-11am) - whereas last semester we covered the history of the Christian faith from the early church to the reformation, this semester we're going to start with the reformation and continue on to present day Christianity. Here are some of the themes we'll touch on:
* Anglican Reformation (mid 16th Century)
* Catholic Counter Reformation, Catholic Doctrine and Missions (mid 16th century)
* The Puritans
* Protestant Scholasticism, the Englightenment
* German Pietism (1675-1725)
* Awakenings: Britain, Europe (1735-1785, 1785-1830)
* Christianity in America
* The Rise of Protestant Liberalism
* American Evangelicalism (19th Century)
* Catholicism (19th Century)
* The Rise and Fall of Evangelicalism
* The Rise and Fall of Social Gospel Liberalism
* Fundamentalism, Modernism (20th Century)
* Renewal Movements
* Expansions: China, Africa (20th Century)
* Pentecostal Explosion in Latin America (20th Century)
* Christianity in the West (20th Century)

2 - History and Theology of the Anglican Church (Fri 9:30am-12:30pm) - my first course with JIP!!! This course will survey the history of the church in England from the reformation to present day. It will include Evangelical, Anglo-Catholic, and Broad Church (Mainline) perspectives. Here are more specifics:
* Introduction: varieties of Anglican Theology today
* The English Reformation
* The Puritans
* Richard Hooker, Caroline Divines
* Rational Divinity, Revival Theology
* The Oxford Movement: Anglo-Catholicism
* The Broad Church Movement: Modernism
* 20th Century Anglicanism
* Evangelical Anglican Theology

I'm also taking the 2nd portion of Supervised Ministry. Details of this course can be found here under point #3.

Course content of #1 & #2 above overlap each other somewhat, but it will be interesting comparing and contrasting the approaches, viewpoints, and opinions of three professors (History of Christianity II is being co-taught by two professors) on these matters.

I'm looking forward to this semester. It'll be a ride. Hopefully a fun ride.

Lord, may the things I'm learning this semester lead to a deeper love of you.

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Ingat!!!

Ingat means "take care" in Tagalog, the national language of the Philippines.

Today I spent time with a dear friend of mine, JR, who came home for Christmas from her missionary stint in the Philippines. We had a great day together.

She and I went to the Philippines together on a missions trip in 2002, and although our time together then was short (3 months), we developed a friendship that will surely last for the remainder of our lives. God has a way of bringing special people into our lives at the right time and place!! Thank you Lord!!

Here's how we spent our day together.

We met for breakfast at 8:30am Filipino time. Translation: 9am. We went for breakfast at Clew's, on Main Street. Afterwards we wento to visit my school. I showed her our classrooms, our chapel, Atrium, library, and bookstore. I'd hoped to introduce her to some of my friends, but none of them were around, and that was disappointing. (She probably thinks I have no friends!!!)

For lunch we visited with some other friends of hers who used to live in Toronto. We took this picture there (incidentally, I broke a crucial Filipino social convention by putting my arm around her .. terrible, terrible):
















Then we went to Metrotown Mall, and walked around. She had to get some last-minute items before she returns to the Philippines tomorrow. I bought her some chcolate, as well as some to take along and give to Ate Bel and the rest of the AHFI team. At the mall, we also stopped for a little tea:
















At 6pm I dropped her off at her niece's place in Surrey. Before we said good-bye, we prayed together. May God grant her JOY and may he protect her as she shares the good news of Jesus Christ in Mindanao.

It was good to see her. INGAT!!!

Sunday, January 15, 2006

Take My Life, And Let It Be

Take my life, and let it be
consecrated, Lord, to thee;
take my moments and my days,
let them flow in ceaseless praise.

Take my hands, and let them move
at the impulse of thy love;
take my feet, and let them be
swift and beautiful for thee.

Take my voice, and let me sing
always, only, for my King;
take my lips, and let them be
filled with messages from thee.

Take my silver and my gold,
not a mite would I withhold;
take my intellect, and use
every power as thou shalt choose.

Take my will and make it thine,
it shall be no longer mine;
take my heart, it is thine own
it shall be thy royal throne.

Take my love; my Lord, I pour
at thy feet its treasure store;
take my self, and I will be
ever, only, all for thee.

_____

Words by Frances Ridley Havergal, 1874.

Sunny?

Can it be? Was it just my imagination or did the sun shine today?

Actually, it was not just my imagination. The sun came out, breaking the chain of 27 straight days of rain. My gosh, had the sun not come out we would have been set to break a new record of consecutive days of rainfall tomorrow, or, said differently, consecutive days without sunshine.

Welcome sun!!!

Friday, January 13, 2006

Bad Milk, Fire Hydrants, And Shampoo

One of the things that drives me bonkers about living in Vancouver is consumer friendships. If I received a $1 for every time a friend jammed out on a planned activity because of "unforseen circumstances", "double-booking" or "bad planning" or whatever, I'd earn enough to buy a place in Monaco or perhaps on the Italian Rivera. It's ridiculous.

Tonight I'd planned to spend time with a couple of guys, but one by one they cancelled out and our plans went down the drain like milk gone bad.

On the other hand, I'm planning a weekend get-away with our community group next weekend, and the level of non-commitment is astonishing. People are all talk, until it comes to action. Once action is required, the excuses come out like water out of a fire-hydrant.

I'm convinced that the root cause of this is utilitarianism and consumerism. I had a conversation with someone earlier this week who told me that post-modernity has reduced humanity to "consuming animals." We are consumers in every sense of the word: socially, physically, economically, and for goodness' sake, even spiritually. We make decisions not based on what is truthful and right, but on what's most practical and economical.

I think he was right. Everything we do nowadays is a consumer decision, based on what will benefit us most. We participate in whichever events will benefit us most, and worse, benefits are not even weighed in terms of people (ie - who do I want to spend time with?), but in terms of entertainment (ie - what will we do? will it be fun?) We put about as much thought and commitment into our friendships as we put into buying shampoo. In other words, not much.

It's frustrating. It's pathetic, and it's bloody shallow.

Sneeze

I'm still not well, been feeling sick for over 10 days now. Strange. Fever's gone. Headache's gone. Cough's almost gone. Throat feels better.

But I still have quite the killer cold.

Monday, January 09, 2006

My Mind's Made Up

I made up my mind over a month ago as to who I was going to vote for in our national election on January 23rd, but after listening to the national debate on the radio just now, I'm even more convinced of my decision.

Stephen Harper's the man. He's got character, integrity, and purpose. Fiscally he's responsible, while socially he's the only man amongst a bunch of liberal ideologue boys who speak of tolerance but have no idea what that word means.

Paul Martin's a liar, opportunist, and he's morally bankrupt. He looks at what people want on any given day and tries to give them that. That's not leadership. That's cowardice.

Jack Layton's the funniest of the lot. I appreciate some of his views on "helping working people", but unfortunately being "anti-corporation" and "anti-USA" doesn't solve the problems he claims to be able to solve.

I won't even waste my time and give the other contestants air-time.

Sunday, January 08, 2006

Temporary Madness

"Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.

Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two."
_____

Taken from the movie Captain Correll's Mandolin. Those who know me well know how much I dislike Hollywood, and I admit that it was a struggle for me to bring myself to quote something from a movie here. But this quote is (in my view) brilliant, regardless of its source.

For too long I've deceived myself by thinking that love is that "temporary madness", "breathlessness", "excitement", and "passion" referred to above. All along I've been looking for a feeling, when I should've been looking to make a decision.

Thanks for the quote and conversation, FL.

Lord have mercy.
Christ have mercy.
Lord have mercy.

Saturday, January 07, 2006

Down But Not Out

Last night was a horrible night. I've been feeling under the weather for a few days now, but last night I finally succumbed to illness. Consequently I slept maybe 2 hours, if that much. The rest of the night I spent tossing and turning.

Sore throat, couldn't swallow anything, phlegm stuck in my throat.
Cough.
Killer headache. My head felt like was going to explode.
Sneeze.
Stuffed sinus.
Watery eyes.
Sweating. Fever came upon me like an evil spirit.

Today I spent pretty much all day in bed. Didn't even have the energy to go out for a 5 minute walk.

I'm sick of tea. I'm sick of ginger. I'm sick of this gigantic lump in my throat.

My one highlight of the day was taking a nice long bath. Oh and yes, surprisingly, I did get a lot of reading done.

Hopefully tomorrow'll be a better day.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Unannounced Visits Are The Best

I know in our Canadian culture unannounced visits are frowned upon, but I absolutely love them. I love it when someone takes a risk and drops by my place without prior warning. This happened yesterday, when my friend ML dropped by.

What more, she dropped by after 10pm. I mean, I could've been in bed by then, yet she took the chance to drop-in. Kudos to you, ML! We had a great time catching up, eating chocolate, and at the end I brought out the good-ol-Pfefferminzkuchen that are always so well received (especially by her!).

She's going back to Tokyo this weekend, where she continues to build her nest. Going to miss her. Gone are the kick-the-yellow-pages days.

Anyways, here are a few pics we took last night.

ML's happy to get the first bite:





































Wait a minute, why doesn't Cub get a bite!?!?















Oh yeah, before I forget! Mom, can I have some more cookies? ML took them all.... ;)