Hamaca Paraguaya

Ted and Karin came over tonight, for an enjoyable evening of food and film.

We met shortly after 6pm in Burnaby, before going for dinner at Anton's, my favourite Italian Restaurant in Vancouver. I remember the days when I used to work at Glenayre, in the last 1990's .. we used to go to Anton's all the time for lunch, because the food is just that good!

Well, things haven't changed there. They still serve the best pasta in Vancouver. After dinner (which included a very very yummy tiramisu cake for dessert), we headed downtown for Hamaca Paraguaya, a Paraguayan movie shown here at the Film Festival.

The movie was good, but very slow, and very minimalist. In fact, the entire movie had less than 10 scenes, I'm sure. But, it did a great job portraying Paraguayan life: simple, but full of dignity. I'm glad I went to see it. The only disappointment was that it was in guarani. I shouldn't be surprised, really, because after all guarani is the native language of the people, but I was hoping to hear some spanish. I love the sound of spanish. It's like music to my ears....

But next week I'll have the opportunity to hear some nice Spanish when I see a movie from Argentina.

It was a good evening: good food, goof film, and good family. :)

Film Festival

My favourite event of the year in Vancouver (together with the Celebration of Light fireworks) is the Vancouver International Film Festival. This year it takes place from September 28-October 13. This is the one time per year where movies actually worth watching hit the scene.

I'm just so fed up with pretentious Hollywood. So, here are the movies I plan to see over the next 15 days:

* Paraguayan Hammock (Hamaca Paraguaya), Paraguay: a married couple go about their daily lives, pondering the fate of their son who's gone off to war --> September 28

* The Great Bazaar (O Grande Bazar), Mozambique: two poverty-stricken boys struggle to survive --> September 29

* Into Great Silence (Die Grosse Stille), Germany: examines the humble existence of those who choose to live a monastic life in the Carthusian Order --> October 1

* Blessed by Fire (Iluminados Por El Fuego), Argentina: a movie about the Falkland Islands war in the early 80's --> October 6

* What is it Worth (Quanto Vale Ou E Por Quilo?), Brazil: a film showing how money raised by charities often times ends up lining the pockets of organizers--> October 13

What To Make Of It All..

I've been seeing Alicia more than usual lately. I saw her at least twice last week. Then I spent Friday afternoon and evening with her.

And today I saw her for a few hours in the afternoon. We met at Granville Island, and parked ourselves along the water with dozens of other people who were thrilled to enjoy another sunny September-Sunday. We both brought books to read: I'm almost finished with Saint Augustine's Confessions, and she was getting some knitting ideas from a knitting book.

I don't know what to make of this.

Trampolining In Abbotsford

It's been great visiting with sibblings over the past few months. It's great to have them back in Canada.

This aftetrnoon I visited Ted and Karin at their home in Abbotsford. I spent a good deal of time with their kids too, jumping on the trampoline. Man, that was great fun.

Around 6ish we also ate a great bbq dinner.

By 8:30 I was back at home, studying.

Cough Cough, Sniff Sniff

I'm sick .. again! I woke up today with a headache the size of .. I don't know, it was big. My nose runs all the way to the floor, and my throat, my God, it feels like I'm swallowing a cactus everytime I swallow...

No More Bells And Whistles, Please!

I'm excited, because Friday lunches are back. Friday lunches are the best lunches at school: Holy Communion with the Anglican Studies group, and then lunch at a chinese restaurant nearby. Odd combination, I know, but does it get any better?

Unlike our weekly chapels on Tuesdays, where one never knows just what to expect (what's it gonna be today, traditional hymns, or contemporized(?) hymns, or contemporary music? .. how many more variations of musical arrangements must we endure [and to boot, they seem to get worse and worse!]? .. and when will we end the mixing and matching of lyrics with melodies? .. and, what kind of a service will we have today: a Pente-Presby-Baptist-Reform, or will it be Free-Anglo-Alliance-Menno? .. puhleeeeeeeease! .. and finally, can we just settle on a set liturgy and stick with it, rather than reinventing the wheel every week .. we have, after all, almost 2000, yes, 2000 years of church history and wisdom to guide us .. please, stop the madness or else, put me out of my misery), Friday services are simple, profound and straight to the point. No frills, no song-and-dance, just the bread, the cup, the liturgy of Holy Communion, and a 10 minute homily. Need we have anything else?

I can't believe I just said that. Nah .. sometimes the truth hurts. Ha! I think I'm becoming a liturgical snob, a "rigourist".

Boulevard Café

I went out with Alicia earlier this afternoon, and had a great time. She had a coupon for the Boulevard Café just around the corner from school, so we went there and drank this carbonated water & fruit juice (mango & coconut) drink. I think it's an Italian drink or something. Whatever it is or wherever it came from, I didn't like it.

But I did enjoy my time with her.

The Inner Voice

I've been thinking a lot lately about what I will do after I graduate next April, God willing. I really don't feel a very particular, specific calling, like being a Pastor, for example. Yet at the same time, I know that God has been preparing me, moulding me over the past 4 years, so that he can use me somewhere for the good of his kingdom.

Earlier this week I read a quote by an alumni of our school. This is what she said in her article: "At Regent I discovered that God wasn't at 'the edge,' hoping I would join Him; He was within me, waiting for me to listen to His love. He wasn't calling me to a geographical destination, but to the centre of my being, to mundane obedience."

I found this article, and this quote in particular, very encouraging, because it invites me to be faithful to God "in the present moment," before all else. Maybe God has called me to a specific geographical location - I don't know - but I need not go anywhere but to the very core of my being, in order to listen to the voice of Jesus there. Furthermore, it's in the small, mundane, daily tasks, that first-and-foremost I need to be obedient.

No Wonder!

I discovered this morning while taking a shower that the shampoo I'm using has an expiry date of 10.19.2003.

No wonder I'm going bald....

Violent Irruption Of Love

This morning I went to church with Alicia, to attend a conference on the book of Genesis. It was very good, I'm glad I went. I love the Hebrew Scriptures. So much of God's character becomes evident in its pages. In fact, without the Old Testament, neither the New Testament nor Jesus make any sense at all. Here are a few things I took away from today's session:

* The Bible contains the story of the "irruption", the in-breaking, of the kingdom of God on earth; this story begins with Genesis

* This in-breaking is essentially a violent irruption of love

* God's kingdom is different than the kingdoms of this world, in that it's ruled by love; this is 1- for God's glory; and 2- for our salvation

* God's kingdom is mediational in nature: Israel mediates God to the world; Jesus Christ mediates God & man; the Church mediates Jesus Christ to an unbeleiving world

* There are 4 components of a nation (ie - Israel): Land, Law, Leader, & People

* People: Israel, but by faith, we are also identified with the faith of Abraham (Galatians 3:26-27)

*Land: Whereas Genesis depicts a physical land of God's kingdom nation, today we are a "spiritual land"; Jesus is our land/space; whereas Israel entered land by faith, we enter Jesus by faith

* Leader: King David was the leader of the OT nation, Jesus is the leader of the NT nation

* Law: OT law was written on rock; NT law written on our hearts; the moral law has not been abolished, but rather, it's administration has, and the Torah has been written in our minds through the Holy Spirit

Finally, I found this helpful: ther's no "utopia" or "perfect society" today, nor is it possible. Adam and Eve lived in it, but they rejected it when they sinned.

DG The OG

David G, also affectionately known as the "Original Gangsta" has been visiting from Toronto the past few days: 8.29-31, 9.5-6. It's been great to see him.

Hanging out with him & Scott L. brings back such great memories from my university days, hanging out with the boys, playing soccer, going partying at the Luvafair. Man, it seems so long ago....

While Dave was here, we went to Al-Watan for Pakistani food twice, we met Scott for lunch downtown once, and we also walked around the city a ton. At first he was quite bitter that we went everywhere on foot, but by the end of his stay he was "converted" to this simpler way of getting from place to place. He found it refreshing, to walk everywhere. He got some exercise that way, he saw the city from "ground level", and what more, he enjoyed the way our conversations flowed more naturally during walks.

Late afternoon he went back to Toronto. Good luck going for walks in that concrete jungle....!

One Last Stab

I have mixed feelings on this day.

I am happy. I'm happy because Sharon got married. I'm not happy about the fact she married, because ever since the day I met her I've loved her, and it's not easy seeing her marry someone else. But all I've ever wanted for her is to be happy, and if this marriage is right for her, then so be it. I bless it. I bless her.

I am relieved. Her marriage provides yet another element of closure for me. It's not like I've had any hopes of getting together: this hope was smashed to smithereens a long time ago, but still, knowing that she now has a ring on her finger does provide yet one more element of finality to the issue.

I am disappointed. I am disappointed because she did not invite me to her wedding. Over the past 4 months she repeatedly told me that she had a wedding invitation for me, yet, she never gave it to me. It's not that I wanted to attend her wedding that badly - I didn't - it's just that she didn't keep her word. She lied to me, and that hurts. It shows me that I don't really matter to her. Perhaps I never did.

I remember how when I was younger my mom always said to me "God has someone very special in mind for you." I believed this, never questioned it. Until I turned 30, unmarried. I started to wonder whether God really did have someone special for me: maybe we just had an inadequate conception of God's will and plan for our lives.

I think it's fair to say that sometimes we want something so badly that we will not even endeavour to conisder the thought that God may have something different, better, in store for us. We cannot bear the thought of not getting what we want, and since we believe in the sovereignty of God, the only potential option left to us (& God) is that he'll 'make things happen.'

C. S. Lewis was right when he said that if God had given him everything he ever asked for he'd be in deep trouble, because not everything he asked for was good for him. In fact, many things he prayed for were downright harmful. The same is true for me. Ahhhh, hindsight vision is always 20/20.

The most important discovery my relational disappointments have led me to is in the way I relate to God, and especially the way I pray. I still believe in God's sovereignty. He is still my Master who will never mislead me. The prophet attests to this, "Whoever is wise, let him understand these things; whoever is discerning let him know them; for the ways of the LORD are right, and the upright walk in them, but transgressors stumble in them" (Hosea 14:9).

And when I pray, I try not to pray that God would "give me this," "make this happen," or "lead me that way." Inevitably I just end up disappointed. God's ways are just too mysterious for me to comprehend. "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts" (Isaiah 55:8-9).

Instead of praying for me, I look for ways to better praise and worship him in life and prayer. I look for ways to serve him more completely, wholeheartedly, unconditionally. As my prayer life is oriented away from me and towards him, it seems to me, I am realigning my whole being away from my selfish tendencies, towards his light, his holy mysteries.

Yes, I still ask, seek, and knock (Matthew 7:7-8). But I try (emphasis on the word try) to do so in order to learn more about God and his ways. This entails asking how I can best serve him, seeking how to best benefit his kingdom, and knocking again and again in expectancy of his mercy, not quick solutions.

I am thankful. Thankful for this discovery. Thankful for all the advice I've received over the years from family and friends. Thankful for Sharon, her marriage, and her happiness. Thankful for disappointments. And I am especially thankful for the LORD's "steadfast love" and "mercies", for they never cease, they never come to an end. Indeed, "they are new every morning." Great is the faithfulness of the LORD (Lamentations 3:22-23).

Travelling Light

I helped my good friend Rudy move into a new apartment earlier this evening, and as I saw all the "stuff" he moved, I couldn't help but be reminded of my own moves over the past 10 years: Abbotsford-New West (1997), New West-Kits (2000), Kits-Fairview (2001), Fairview-City Hall (2002), and furthermore, I couldn't help but think how much we love to gather and collect stuff.

All kinds of stuff. Big stuff. Small stuff. Old stuff. New stuff. Good stuff. Bad stuff. Some stuff that we need, but really when it comes right down to it, a whole lotta shitty stuff that really serves no need at all, other than distracting us even for just a tiny little while from anything remotely important.

Neil Postman wrote, among other books, a book called "Amusing Ourselves To Death". I think I need to read that book, because he probably addresses this tendency of ours to accummulate and consume for no other reason than self-amusement.